One morning, 18-year-old Markus is rudely awoken by a message on the breakfast radio: “… from Sandra who sends her love to her boyfriend, sweetiepie Markus! All the very best to my cuddly Schnubbi!” Horrified, he jumps out of bed and nervously begins to prepare for one of his last days at school – in three weeks’ time, he’ll be sweating over his A-level exams.